Rosa Say, author of Managing with Aloha, would agree with the statement that management and leadership go hand in hand. However, understanding the difference and when to be a manager versus a leader is one of the keys to effective coaching.
My email tagline reads: "Lead People, Manage Numbers." Simply put, it means that you need to train people to meet metrics that the company requires or mutually agreed upon during a career development planning session. However, simply looking at the numbers (comparative charts, spreadsheets, and reports) will not lead to success. Only people, who behave responsibly and respectively, can do that.
Because the lines between the roles of coach and manager can become blurred, it is critical that the coaching relationship is established with clear expectations and monitoring steps early on. The Center for Creative Leadership (CCL) has developed a series of podcasts related to individual and team coaching. I've summarized some of the best coaching tips here, all of which I use in my coaching relationships. I encourage you to explore the free CCL podcasts available through iTunes.
1. Expect the best: be prepared to always look for the best in people and in the situation. As they say in Senn Delaney, "assume innocence." Start the coaching relationship with a positive mindset and assume that the person you are training is willing to learn, reflect, and grow.
2. Define what you want: Be explicit about what you both want from the coaching relationship. What do you want to achieve? Make sure your goals match before you begin; if they don't, try to compromise. If that doesn't work, suggest another Mitarbeitercoaching.
3. Clearly define your roles - Be clear about the role of coach vs. manager. If you're in both roles, set signals to indicate when you move from one role to the other. Starting sentences with "Are you ready for training?" or "I would like to talk to you about your performance", define if you are training or directing. However, if you do not play a leadership role, establish whether or not the results of the coaching sessions will be shared with the person's manager. Trust is a critical piece of the coaching relationship and breach of trust is a deal breaker.
4. Self-awareness is non-negotiable: encourage, and indeed insist, that the person you are training develop self-awareness. This is perhaps the hardest step for some people, because the only way you can truly become self-aware is if you ask everyone around you for feedback, they are sincere, and they really listen to them. The best rule of thumb is something like this: "If a man calls you an ass, ignore him. But if three men call you an ass, go out and buy yourself a saddle."
5. Listen First: When the person you are mentoring is reflecting on a negative outcome or experience, ask questions to elicit a thoughtful resolution to the problem rather than giving advice on how to get it right next time. It's much quicker to tell people how to "fix" it, but our peers don't learn by fixing it. I encourage coaching teams to collaboratively develop the solution.
There are times when coaching has to step aside to lead. For example, when an employee resists instructions, infects other team members with negative behaviors, or challenges team or company methodologies. I call this phenomenon "an employee going crazy." In these cases, you should remove your coach hat and put on your boxing gloves from the manger. This can mean anything from having a discussion of clarifying rules and roles to taking disciplinary action. It is extremely important that you adhere to step 3, defining your role as a coach, manager, or both. If you are in both roles, I suggest you find another coach for the person, as changing the management structure is generally not appropriate. The important thing to remember is that coaching is very similar to parenting: there is no perfect method, some are better than others, but it is the people and their relationship that count the most.
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